Peanuts Jokes. Could you help me understanding peanuts jokes below?

1Q: Where do peanut drivers go to fill their tanks? A: The Shell station!

2 Q: How do you catch an elephant? A: Hide in the grass and make a sound like a peanut!

3Q: What kind of socks do you need to plant peanuts? A: Garden hose!

4 Q: Where did the peanuts go to have a few drinks? A: The Snack Bar! Two peanuts were walking down a road One was assaulted

5Q: What do you call a peanut in a spacesuit? A: An astronut!

6Q: Did you hear the joke about the peanut butter? A: I'm not telling you. You might spread it!

7Q. How is a dumb blonde like peanut butter? A. They spread for the bread.

8Q: Why did the girl smear peanut butter on the road? A: Because she's nuts!

9Q: What did the apple say to the peanuts? A: You're Nuts!

10Q: What did the peanut say to the elephant? A: Nothing, peanuts can't talk

11Q: Why are people in Illinois having peanut butter and jelly for Thanksgiving this year? A: Because they're sending their turkey to the White House!

12Q) What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? A) I can't peanut butter my cock down your throat!

13Q: What kind of nuts hang? A: wallnuts.

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/miscellaneousjokes/foodjokes/peanutjokes.html

Question

Peanuts Jokes. Could you help me understanding peanuts jokes below?

1Q: Where do peanut drivers go to fill their tanks? A: The Shell station!

2 Q: How do you catch an elephant? A: Hide in the grass and make a sound like a peanut! 

3Q: What kind of socks do you need to plant peanuts? A: Garden hose!

4 Q: Where did the peanuts go to have a few drinks? A: The Snack Bar! Two peanuts were walking down a road One was assaulted 

5Q: What do you call a peanut in a spacesuit? A: An astronut! 

6Q: Did you hear the joke about the peanut butter? A: I'm not telling you. You might spread it!

7Q. How is a dumb blonde like peanut butter? A. They spread for the bread. 

8Q: Why did the girl smear peanut butter on the road? A: Because she's nuts! 

9Q: What did the apple say to the peanuts? A: You're Nuts! 

10Q: What did the peanut say to the elephant? A: Nothing, peanuts can't talk 

11Q: Why are people in Illinois having peanut butter and jelly for Thanksgiving this year? A: Because they're sending their turkey to the White House! 

12Q) What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? A) I can't peanut butter my cock down your throat! 

13Q: What kind of nuts hang? A: wallnuts. 

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/miscellaneousjokes/foodjokes/peanutjokes.html

belthazar · Answer

For 11, Obama comes from Illinois, and the US Presidential Election happens in early November, shortly before Thanksgiving. The joke is that because Obama became president (i.e. they sent their turkey to the White House), then they need to eat something else for Thanksgiving.

It's a little bit dated, and I'm not sure it's very funny anyway. =P

It's a little bit dated, and I'm not sure it's very funny anyway. =P

rosalinda · Answer

Q1: Shell is a pretty common brand of gas station, at least in Britain where i'm from. Peanuts also have hard shells on the outside, so this joke links the "Shell" station, with the peanut "shell".

Q2: Elephants famously enjoy eating peanuts, and so will seek them out. With animals, people normally try to sound like something that will attract them, (e.g. meow like a cat to get the attention of a dog), so this joke is saying that you should pretend you're a peanut to attract the elephant. Obviously, peanuts make no sound, so this is impossible, but that's where the humour comes from.

Q3: I'm not sure i understand this entirely. I think it may be a reference to "pantyhose", which are a kind of old-fashioned tights. Saying "garden-hose" instead of pantyhose puts a link to gardening in the answer, which also has to do with planting things. I'm not sure what this has to do with peanuts exactly.

Q4: A snack bar is an area of a pub reserved for small snacks, the most famous of which are peanuts. A bar is somewhere you go to get drinks. So whilst humans would visit the bar for drinks, peanuts would visit the snack bar, as that's where they're most often found.
/
Assaulted sounds like "a-SALTED". Salted peanuts are one of the most common types of peanuts eaten.

Q5: Astronauts are people who wear space-suits and venture out into space. A peanut is a kind of nut. "Astro-nut" is a nut (peanut) that travels in space, and thus wears a spacesuit.

Q6: Peanut butter is something you spread on toast. To spread something is also to tell a lot of people about it. You spread peanut butter, like you might spread this joke.

Q7: This one is pretty mean, and inappropriate. Again, peanut butter is spread onto bread, but a "dumb blonde" is a stereotype of a blonde girl. This stereotype says that "dumb blonde"s will essentially have sex with anyone. So here, saying they will "spread for the bread", implies that they would even "spread their legs open" for a piece of bread.

rosalinda · Answer

Q8: To smear peanut butter on the road is obviously a pretty odd thing to do. A peanut is a kind of nut, and "nuts" is also slang for "crazy". So, the girl who spread peanut butter on the road was crazy, or "nuts", which is a pun on the peanut butter.

Q9: This is the same as above. "Nuts" = crazy. So the nuts, (the peanuts), are crazy.

Q10: This is an anti-joke. That means that, while you expect a pun or a funny answer, you just get something straightforward and not funny at all. For some, this in itself is funny. So just saying "peanuts can't talk" is completely true, and as it's not a pun or anything even remotely funny, some people would find that funny.

Q11: I'm afraid i don't understand this one.

Q12: To jam something is to force it violently. So, whilst you cannot "peanut butter" it, you can "jam" it. I'm sure i don't have to explain this, but it's another rude one.